what is fun to Talia?
The prompt today is: When was the last time you had fun with a friend? What did you do, and what about that experience with that person was enjoyable/fun?
Uh…I had a pretty much terrible childhood. I did not have a lot of fun as a kid, and so now I am pretty much regressing/“healing my inner child.” Or I would say my inner teenager at this time smirk emoji
Similarly to being a companion/escort, and how I decide to live my life in general is I don’t do shit unless I want to. I remember one of the icebreaker questions in grad school (forreal fuck icebreaker questions) was, “What is a guilty pleasure of yours?” I had a knee-jerk reaction because why does something that is pleasureable have to be guilty? Like the main page of my website says, “Escape the harsh realities of the human experience, and let me touch you in the dead of night.” I am truly trying to create a fantasy so I can escape, feel alive, and the thrill. As an escort that is the mileau I am attempting to create when spending quality time with a client.
Like I said I only do shit I want to do, which emphatically includes being a companion/escort. I cannot fake shit to save my life, and have gotten in a pickle numerous times because I felt guilty about telling a “white lie.”
Returning to the prompt the last time I hung out with a friend, and had fun was this last Monday/Presidents’ Day weekend. I bought a blended Vietnamese coffee, bánh mì (pork with extra cilantro for them & a shredded chicken for me), bánh cuốn (my ABSOLUTE favorite everyone should eat once in their life), and eggrolls. We watched One Piece together, which they shared was one of their comfort watches growing up. They took a nap while I watched One Piece. This is a newer friend that I have fun plans with in the future, and I am so excited to get to know them more. I have heard making friends as you mature becomes difficult. If I could do anything to make the world a better place is to ensure that anyone who feels lonely has a community they feel seen in, and are well fed.
As an autistic/ADHD human parallel play is one of my favorite things to do. I am okay, and even prefer sitting in silence with a friend while we do different things next to each other. Once I am able to feel comfortable with a human to not feel the intense urge for constant communication. I feel such a relief. I have found my people. Intimacy takes various shapes, and forms. As someone who has had a wide range of human experiences I would liken myself to a chameleon. In my current form I love getting to know people, people/sex are my fixation/thing as a neurodivergent human. Getting to know someone’s mind, spirit, and body (especially a drastically different person/culture than me) is like figuring out a puzzle. I love getting to know people, and have a variety of experiences with a variety of people.
I feel like that is enough disclosure of my innerworkings for today.
xoxo,