creative outlet

I have not easily identified as a creative person but I have a lot of thoughts and feelings. I get depressed often and lay in bed for extended periods of time. I have worked from home for the past 6 years and I am a social person. I miss my friends in Seattle but I am trying to stick it out in Las Vegas. I want to live somewhere else to see what it is like. I grew up in Washington state and went to undergrad and graduate school there. Friends and community give meaning to life, feeling alone is a terrifying existenial feeling. Craving intensen connection and being seen by another human is validating. All I want to be is understood but I am not good at expressing it. My friends have a difficult time understanding me but I do not understand why. The connections and non linear thought process of my mind can be hard for folks to interpret.