Yet another entry on adversity
Today’s prompt: Name a difficult situation you overcame, and how you felt afterwards?
The funny thing about overcoming a “difficult situation” is that in the moment it may not feel like a difficult situation. In the moment I feel like the world is crumbling, and I am going to die. I do not remember a lot of my difficult situations now because I chose to not dwell in things that no longer serve me.
Reflecting on my lived experiences I have overcame a lot of uncomfortable, unglamourous situations. Life and the people we see can be unkind, harsh, and unforgiving. Why would I want to dwell on that when I have the soft princess life I have always wanted? Unfortunately, in difficult situations is where I thrive. In crisis situations I am cool as a cucumber, but at the slightest minor inconvenience in my day to day life I cannot function. When it comes to crisis situations I don’t think about myself, or my needs. I only think about how to be unnoticeable, and how to make those around me feel safe.
My first full-time job after undergrad I worked at a receiving care home for youth entering foster care. The home was for initial emergency placements for up to 5 children, for the first 72 hours they came into care. I am very skilled in how to work with youth who are going through painful trauma in difficult situations, being separated from you caregivers, and often going to the emergency room for hours with complete strangers. I worked there for over a year, and learned so much about others, and how to navigate painful heart wrenching situations. None of this sexy, and I find most of society wants to ignore the ugly situations in regards to the human condition. I have never shied away from the harsh realities of life. In fact that is where I thrive. I don’t know why but feel part of my purpose in life is to hold people, and guide them through pain. Alike to Persephone guiding souls to the underworld. I am ok with that, even more than ok. I want to that’s my calling. I feel pretty fucking confident that is why I enjoy being a companion. I was to be present for people the way regular degular society cannot. I want to show up when no one shows up. I want everyone to feel they are important, their desires matter, and to feel seen. I hope to establish more relationships in this part of my life with that certain dynamic. I don’t need to be someone’s everything (I would NEVER want to be that). I prefer to be there for a certain period, and then let them free to explore more confidently on their own.
I would much rather folks figure out what they want via a companion/transactional boundary than traumatize people in dating. Anyways I am getting sleepy again, and going to try to relax before I log into work.
much love and warmness,